life changing realizations on a thursday afternoon...

"Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can NEVER perish, spoil, or fade-- kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God's power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith-- of even greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire-- may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. Though you have not seen him, you love him, and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls." -1Peter 1:3-9

His mercy blows me away. He has given us "new birth into a living hope". How can I ever feel down? How can I ever feel defeated by struggles? He speaks clear... that our inheritance can NEVER perish, spoil, or fade. It doesn't say that it will fade if you do this or that. It doesn't say it will perish if I give in another time. Sometimes this is so hard for me to grasp. But right now, I cling to it. I cling to the fact that my Father tells me I am new and that I have a living hope.

"But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people belonging to God, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness and into his wonderful light. Once you were not a people, but now you are the people of God. Once you had not received mercy, but now you have received mercy." -1Peter 2:9-10

We are chosen. We belong to Him. He has called us out of darkness, out of disgusting lives of sin, out of shame, out of defeat... into His wonderful light, that never fades, his light that brings life, a life full of hope, a life that is purified, a life that IS possible through Him.

As much as I ask myself what it is that I'm doing wrong... what is it that I just don't get... why I can't do this... the answer to any question I could ever ask is this: I need more Jesus.